Center Stage (Springfield, MA)

Quality of dances (13/20) – They lose points here because there is such inconsistency from girl to girl. You might get one dance where there's no contact with your lower body, then the next dance leaves you with lipstick stains on the crotch of your pants. If you do manage to find the right girl, the dances are excellent, as evidenced by the fact that I've had to Purell my nipples when I left.

Quality of dancers (6/10) – There aren't any ugly dancers here, but there aren't more than 1 or 2 girls who would rate an 8 or above either. And, as with most clubs, when a few girls are significantly more attractive than the rest, the hottest ones don't feel a need to really work for the money. If you're getting a dance, go for a "6" or a "7." The one advantage that this place has over Mardi Gras is that there are significantly less implants here.

Number of Dancers (5/10) – There are three or four girls on stage and about the same amount looking to give dances, and they just rotate after each set. This gives a great ratio in the afternoon, but they don't increase the number of dancers when it gets busier, so you might have to wait for a dance then.

Variety/Diversity of dancers (3.5/5) – It really depends on when you go, because I've visited on nights where pretty much everyone was white, but I also saw a hot Asian girl, a few black dancers and some attractive Latinas during my most recent visit.  There's usually some decent size variation as well, and even the larger ladies are not of the sloppy variety.

Attitude of dancers (3/10) – "Hi, I'm ___, would you like a dance?" is about as much conversation as you'll get out of these girls. They're good about counting dances and seem happy to perform for you on stage, but some of them just sit by themselves when they're off stage and force you to approach them for dances.

Value (6.5/10) – Parking is free, beer is $5, and if there's ever a cover, it starts fairly late. You'll get your money's worth for $1 at the stage, but the payoff on your $25 dance fee really depends on the girl you get.

Dance Setup (2/10) – This is yet another Massachusetts club with a large open room for lap dances. You get your own chair, and two of the chairs are offset a little bit, but this is still a poor setup.

Club Setup (2/10) – As with the dance room, the club has the usual shitty Massachusetts setup - big stage, tiny bar, and few other places to sit. The club is fairly large though, and according to a several-year-old old sign on the door, it's "The newest club in New England."

Club Atmosphere (4/10) – I like the atmosphere better at Mardi Gras, but you should feel fairly safe here, and in Springfield, that's a big deal. Center Stage isn't a bad place to grab a beer and a dance, but I'm not sure that I'd usually hang out here for too long. The one exception would be on nights when they have nude roller derby, or "Roll-or-gazum" as they call it, with a midget referee. I have not personally witnessed this, but I can only imagine that the atmosphere is off the charts. If you're interested, you should check their site for details.

Club Accessibility (4.5/5) – They have their own free parking lot and they're located in a relatively safe part of Springfield.

Overall – Anthony's is slightly better than any of the downtown clubs, but if you inexplicably want to stay in downtown Springfield, Mardi Gras and Center Stage each have their strengths. Mardi Gras has more dancers, hotter dancers, and more promises of VIP fun, but the girls at Center Stage have less silicone and give much better lap dances. Also, the clubs are very close to each other, so you could always try both of them.

TOTAL SCORE = 49.5

Updated July 2012.