Sunday, September 12, 2010

Mardi Gras II (East Windsor, CT)

Quality of Dances (11/20) – I've gotten some decent grind action and have been allowed to touch the legs and hips, but the dance setup doesn't really allow things to get too intimate. It's probably worth getting a dance if you're already in the club, but I wouldn't go out of my way for it.

Quality of Dancers (7.5/10) – Almost every girl in this place is pretty, but not stunningly so. I haven't seen many dancers here that I'd rate below a 6 or above an 8. That still puts them in the upper echelon of Connecticut clubs, but it would be nice to see a knockout once in a while.

Number of Dancers (6/10) – Mardi Gras II has a lot of girls working on the Friday and Saturday nights, but the place can get packed, so it can still be hard to get a girl for a dance. On the bright side, at least you do get to watch several girls on stage at a time while you wait. The crowds aren't bad during the day, but obviously there aren't as many girls working then either.

Variety/Diversity of dancers (3/5) – I've seen some black girls and a few Latinas, but the majority of the girls here are white. There's a decent mix of body types, but all of the girls that I've seen have been at least relatively fit.

Attitude of dancers (3/10) – When this place is packed, no girls will be spending more than a minute or two with any individual guy, but they do seem to be friendly for the most part once your get their attention. The small gap between customers and the stage also makes interaction a little more difficult than it should be, and one loyal reader has reported that the dancers aren't overly inviting to couples.

Value (8/10) – You'll have a hard time finding a better deal than a $3 weekend evening cover and $3 drafts. The dances are a reasonable value at $20 each and you get a great show for a few bucks at the stage, but the beer prices are what really make this place ideal for a cheap outing.

Dance Setup (3/10) – The dances are given in a sectioned off area in the corner of the club on several small individual couches.  They aren't particularly comfortable and allow the guy across from you to watch your dance, but they do at least provide some separation and are a huge improvement over the way the dance area was setup a few years ago.

Club Setup (4/10) – The bar is enormous and takes up almost the entire club, and the stage is inside the bar area. There's a narrow area between the bar and the stage where the bartenders can walk to deliver drinks, so you're a little further from the dancers than you'd be in most clubs, but a lot of them go over the channel and dance on the actual bar. They only have a few tables that aren't at the bar, but unfortunately, the lack of non-bar/non-stage space in the club makes it unlikely that this problem will ever be corrected.

Club Atmosphere (7/10) – The lack of tables is the only thing that really holds this club back from being a great place for large groups to hang out, but it's still a lot of fun for small groups or solo outings.

Club Accessibility (1/5) –This club is between Springfield and Hartford, but isn't particularly close to either. It's a shame that a place with such amazing drink prices isn't close enough to any metropolitan areas/hotels to allow you to take full advantage without worrying about having a designated driver.

Overall – This is one of the better clubs in northern Connecticut, but unless the dance setup improves, I just can't justify going here when the Electric Blue is only 20 minutes away. Mardi Gras II would be a very solid choice though if you're looking for a change of pace or aren't particularly interested in lap dances.

TOTAL SCORE = 53.5

Updated: February, 2012

Monday, September 6, 2010

Club Downtown (Montreal, QC)

Quality of Dances (14/20) - One of the best things about Montreal is that you can grab a handful of titty in just about every club, and Downtown is no exception. The only real variation (other than at "upscale" places like Wanda's) is the quality of the grind, and that's well above average in this club. I haven't seen any signs of extras, but if you're looking to push your luck in one of the clubs in this area of Ste. Catherine, this would probably be your best shot.

Quality of Dancers (7/10) - The girls here are hot even by Montreal standards, but they have way more than their fair share of fake breasts.

Number of Dancers (6/10) – Club Downtown is full of dancers, but there are so many customers on busy weekends that it can still be hard to find someone for a dance. It's right down the street from the Centre Bell, so there's a particularly poor dancer-to-customer ratio when there's a Habs game or a concert.

Variety/Diversity of Dancers (2/5) - They have a decent mix of black and white dancers, but thin white blondes are over represented and there aren't a whole lot of curvier ladies.

Attitude of dancers (2/10) – A lot of the girls in this place are stuck up. I admit that they're attractive, but they aren't quite as hot as they think they are. I've been more impressed with the attitudes during the day shift, probably because there aren't 100 other customers waiting to hand a dancer cash if she pisses you off.

Value (6/10) – The $5 cover is about average, the drinks are expensive (as they are everywhere in Montreal), and the dances are an excellent value at $15 each. This place isn't a bad value, but it's tough to look good on the value scale when Cafe Cleopatra and its $10 dances are just a 10 minute walk away.

Dance Setup (8.5/10) – Dances are given in small booths on 3rd floor of building. They have curtains on the entrance to each booth, and although they're somewhat sheer, they're thick enough that no one can see in unless they stand there and stare - which they thankfully don't. They even get a bonus point for the airline safety style drawings reminding your drunk ass of their dance rules. Hands on the ass - ok. Pulling down their bottoms - not so much.

Club Setup (3/10) – The setup is the same as everywhere else on this block - narrow club on 2nd floor, small stage, small crowded bar and a bunch of small tables. The only thing that sets this place apart is the urinal, which is a waterfall that you piss into. It's not much, but I'm easily amused when I'm drunk.

Club Atmosphere (7/10) – This place has a great party vibe and is somewhere that you could spend several hours. As with all of the clubs in this area, there are always going to be some obnoxious tourists, but it's just too much fun for me to really care.

Club Accessibility (5/5) – Club Downtown is so accessible that you can sneak in a visit even if you're on a romantic getaway to Montreal with your girlfriend. Just say you're going to grab some poutine and run. Or so I've heard.

Overall – If the girls' attitudes would improve, this place would probably slightly beat out Super Contact for the title of best club on Rue Saint Catherine. As is, it's good enough to keep me coming back, but not so good as to ever get me to spend an entire evening here. It's definitely worth a visit though, especially if you're staying nearby or going to any of the other clubs in this part of town.

TOTAL SCORE = 59.5