Sunday, August 21, 2011

Cowboys (Lexington, KY)

Quality of Dances (12/20) – The dances at Cowboys are among the best that you'll find in Lexington.  Most of the girls give a solid grind and are active over the pants (and in a few cases, under the pants) with their hands.  The over the pants vibrating mouth action is particularly popular and appreciated.  Unfortunately, other than hands on the hips, the contact is one-way and the bottoms stay on.  I usually stick with topless dances anyway, but it is nice at all the other Lexington clubs to have the option to upgrade if the mood strikes.  On the plus side, even though lap dances are always my dance of choice, it's nice that they also offer moderate friction table dances that are just as useful if your real goal is to give the girl a tryout for the 15 minute VIP.  Some of the girls offer to lend a helping hand in the VIP and a few might even do more than that, but the separate cameras pointed directly at each VIP booth will be enough to keep guys with anything to lose from trying to go too far.

Quality of Dancers (6.5/10) – They usually have a few 8s and 9s, but quality control is fairly low, with a sizeable percentage of the girls having some glaring weakness, such as a bad boob job, a jacked up face or just a generally tired and worn out appearance.

Number of Dancers (5/10) – The actual number of dancers isn't too bad with short stage sets and not too many repeats, but the fact that there are only a few truly hot ones combined with the fact that most if not all of those hot ones are perpetually tied up with regulars means that you're going to have to drop your standards or be very patient if you want a dance when it's busy.  I was approached by a few worthy dance candidates by the end of my first beer during the day shift, but on a Saturday night, it was rare to be approached by any of the dozen-ish dancers who were on the floor, and it was even more rare to be approached by anyone who I'd rate as a 7 or above.  Of course, things are much better if you're a regular, but, for the rest of us, the lack of quality dancers can be frustrating.

Variety/Diversity of Dancers (1.5/5) – Most of these girls are either thin and white or very thin and white.  Even though I did see a few black dancers, hair color was the only meaningful variation, because all of the women who were worth a look were Caucasian.

Attitude of Dancers (6.5/10) – Some of the hottest dancers are all business, particularly when the club is busy, but these ladies are generally pretty friendly.  I'm a particularly big fan of the way that a lot of them ask if you want company after you get a dance.  It really puts the ball in your court in a way that isn't too aggressive while still giving the shy guys an opening to ask for what they want.  They do try to use the lap dances to upsell to the VIP, but even that is low pressure, and a few girls suggested that I sample a few girls' table dances and lap dances before picking one for the VIP so that I'd be happy with my choice.  That's always a good idea anyway, but I've never had dancers suggest it.

Value (6.5/10) – The cover is low, cans of beer are only $3.25 and you can't beat $5 table dances, so Cowboys isn't a bad place to go if you're trying to stretch a dollar.  Lap dances are a little over priced at $20 each since they usually play very short songs, but at least you feel like you're getting something for your money. If you're looking to get a little more though, 15 minutes in the VIP area will run you $150.

Dance Setup (1.5/10) –  Lap dances are given in a separate room off of a back corner of the club, so nobody in the regular part of the club can watch you while you're getting your dances.  Unfortunately, there are no dividers in the room and it's very bright, so the DJ and anyone who's giving or receiving a dance can see you.  I'm not factoring in the VIP dance setup for this score, but, in case you're curious, it's a row of large booths that are only visible to people walking to and from their own VIP dances.  Well, them and whoever is monitoring the video feeds from the cameras that are right in front of and pointed at each booth.

Club Setup (3/10) – This place is a total dive.  There's a decent bar at one side of the club and a small bar at the other side and there are four high tables, but most people just sit at the shitty small tables with rolly chairs. The club is small enough that no one is too far from the main stage or the tiny stage that's off to the one side (or the third stage that was unused while I was there), but the lack of seating at the stage means that guys line up to hand the girls tips, blocking everyone else's view in the process.

Club Atmosphere (4.5/10) – If you're looking for a gentlemen's club, go elsewhere, because Cowboys is a strip joint in the purest sense.  Cans of beer?  A slightly rough crowd?  Country music? Check, check, check.  Having said that, there are enough young bachelor partiers and crusty old men that you'd shouldn't feel too out of place no matter who you are.

Club Accessibility (4/5) – Cowboys is on the north side of town, but it's not far from downtown Lexington and is fairly close to a few other strip clubs.  The location at the back of a strip mall is a little unusual, but there's plenty of parking and the entrance is discreet, so it's not bad.

Overall – Cowboys is very much a hybrid of the glamorous clubs like Platinum Plus and the gritty clubs like Divas.  Whether its a best-of-both-worlds hybrid or a worst-of-both-worlds hybrid really depends on when you go.  The relatively small number of quality dancers means that you never quite know what you'll get on any particular visit, but your chances of finding it at its best are inversely proportional to how busy the club is, so I'd try not to go on a weekend night if at all possible.  If you hit it right (or if you're a regular, in which case you already know this), Cowboys is the only club in town where you can get above average dances from above average dancers.  If you hit it wrong, though, it can be a frustrating experience.  Overall, it's worth stopping by and having a beer while you scope it out, but you need to be willing to bail if necessary, because it will not improve as the night goes on.



  1. You Need to come see it now after the Remold...

  2. Dancer at cowboys are down to earth and easy going too. Please go to see Kendra or Shelby.

  3. Cowboys is best club in Lexington.