Ten's Show Club (Salisbury, MA)

Quality of dances (2/20) – The dances here are a huge disappointment. Almost everything else about the club is average or better, but my hands were planted firmly at my sides and the girl never worked her way beyond mid-thigh.

Quality of dancers (5/10) – I know someone who now refers to the Ten's as the Fours, reflecting the club's fall from grace in dancer quality. I don't think it's quite that bad, but I can't rate them above average these days.  The dancers' bodies are still tight, but it seems that most of the pretty faces have left for greener pastures. This is especially depressing because the Ten's used to have some of the best talent in Massachusetts. There is one caveat: because this is a beachfront club, it's very possible that the hotties leave for the winter because of slowed business and then roll back in when the sun comes out. I'll give it another shot in June and see if that hypothesis is supported.

Number of Dancers (6/10) – When I was here last year on a Friday evening, the club was overflowing with dancers; there were at least as many dancers as customers. Last night, however, the ratio was less favorable. Perhaps 12-15 dancers were working, which is a light workforce for a club of this size. 

Variety/Diversity of dancers (2.5/5) - With the exception of a few exotic outliers, the vast majority of women here are white. Still, there's a wide enough variety of body types and hair colors to keep anyone interested.

Attitude of dancers (7.5/10) – It's rare to find girls at this classy of a club who are this down to earth. They don't mind spending some time with the customers, and the sales pitch is subtle or non-existent. One girl sat and talked to me for 20 minutes, and without trying to sell me on a dance, eventually said, "I guess I should get back to work now," then left to talk to other customers. I know she was working when she was talking to me too, but it's a nice approach that more girls should use. Also, despite there being little contact at the stage (see the Value score below), dancers tend to be very interactive and playful up there, which is fun.

Value (3/10) – The cover and the drinks are steep at $10 ($5 before 7 PM and $15 after 9 PM) and $6 (Miller Lite, of course) respectively, and there's not much contact at the stage or in the dances. The lap dances are $20, but they're no different than the $10 table dances.

Dance Setup (2/10) – You can either sit in a chair in the back of the club or in a chair on the 2nd floor. There aren't usually many people on the 2nd floor, so it could be worse, but the dance setup it still pretty bad.

Club Setup (9/10) – This is a large circular club with a bar around about half of the outside of the circle. There's a large clover-leaf stage in the center of the club, and it's surrounded by plenty of tables and chairs. The second floor is mainly set up for viewing the three huge televisions on the wall, but there's also a balcony that overlooks the main stage. I didn't see the third floor, but apparently it's usually available for private parties. Ignoring the shitty dance setup, the rest of this club has by far the best design of any club in the state, and is one of the most well-designed clubs I've ever been to. 

Club Atmosphere (7/10) – For an upscale club, this place actually still has a fairly relaxed atmosphere. In addition to the friendly dancers, there are always massage girls and often groups of curious women who wander in from the beach. The pole dancing used to be superb, but it appears to have taken a turn for the worse. Preston is still making it happen up there, as are a couple of other women.However, they're the exception these days, not the rule.

Club Accessibility (3/5) – Salisbury isn't really close to anything else, but if you're going to Salisbury beach, the club is right beside it.

Overall – Ten's Show Club is by far the best upscale club in Massachusetts. The dances are legitimately awful and the drinks are overpriced, but those are my only real complaints about the place. If you want to introduce a girl to strip clubs or are in the mood to look but not touch, there really isn't a better option in Massachusetts.

TOTAL SCORE = 47