Sunday, April 17, 2011

Cheerleaders (Pittsburgh, PA)




Quality of Dances (12/20) – I’ve found a ton of variation from one girl to the next,  but for the most part, these are very solid dances.  Tit grabbing was not only tolerated, but was actually encouraged, and more than one girl used her leg and mouth skillfully over the pants.  The dances are topless, but many of the girls adjust the bottoms to give you a full view.  Some of the other girls give dances that are satisfactory at best, but you should be able to have a decent time if you chose wisely. 

Quality of Dancers (8/10) – These ladies are Pittsburgh’s finest, which, surprisingly, is relatively fine.  I expected a little more quality control from a place that takes itself as seriously as this place does, but most of the girls were 7’s or 8’s, and the few girls who I’d rate below that were the affirmative action hires, which I’m ok with in a largely white city.

Number of Dancers (3/10) – Cheerleaders’ popularity is their downfall in this category.  They have 3 girls on stage at a time during the evening, and they’ve got several more ladies patrolling the crowd, but it can be nearly impossible to get a girl’s attention for a dance due to the large number of customers during  prime club hours.

Variety/Diversity of Dancers (3/5) – As far as I can tell, there aren’t a whole lot of Asians or Latinas in Pittsburgh, and the selection at Cheerleaders reflects that.  Still, I was happy to see a fair number of black dancers and some size variation in addition to the expected white blonds.

Attitude of Dancers (3.5/10) – I met a few very friendly dancers at Cheerleader’s, but way too many of them are picky about what customer’s they’ll talk to.  I understand that, from their point of view, the club is so packed that even if they piss off 50 guys, 50 other guys will still be willing to drop cash on them.  Still, it sucks if a girl you’ve been waiting for passes you by because she assumes that the guy wearing a suit has more money than you.  I guess that happens everywhere to some extent, but it was particularly blatant at Cheerleaders.  Or maybe I just noticed it more because, on this occasion, I wasn’t  the guy in the suit. 

Value (1/10) – If you’re going to have a mandatory non-complimentary valet service, you shouldn’t have a cover change.  It isn’t so much that it’s expensive, though that plus a beer usually adds up to $20 (it was $25 the night I was there because a fight was on TV), but it really just feels like a scam.  As does the requirement to get bottle service or pay a $2 upcharge on beers to sit at one of the tables. The dances are an ok value at $25 and the topless stage action doesn’t cost much due to the distance between the bar and the stages, but I’m knocking them down on this because you’ll walk of here feeling like you got scammed. 

Dance Setup (4.5/10) – Dances are given in a separate room from the main area of the club on several individual small benches.  The benches are angled so that you’re facing, at most, one or two other benches, and the benches have high backs, so no one will be able to peak over your shoulder.  So, overall, it’s fairly solid if the club isn’t too crowded and the girls properly distribute customers.  Unfortunately, when the club is crowded, and it usually is, at least one other customer/dancer pair will see what you’re up to.

Club Setup (6/10) – This is a nice club overall with a set of stairs coming down to a center stage and two satellite stages off to the sides.  Each of the satellite stages is several feet away from a large bar area, so you get to toss balled up 1’s at the girls and don’t need to tip a whole lot, but interaction with the girls at the stages is non-existent.  My biggest complaint, though, is that there aren’t really any tables unless you sit in the bottle service area around the perimeter of the club, but I refuse to do that on principle.  On the plus side, they have the often overlooked but always appreciated beer shelves at the urinals.  Those things really should be standard at any decent club.

Club Atmosphere (6.5/10) – This place is a little on the upscale side, but the vibe is still relatively relaxed and the crowd is good.  I probably wouldn’t come here with a large group due to the lack of tables (fuck bottle service), but it’s a solid place to hang and down a beer or two with a few buddies.  Be forewarned though, they sell cigars and allow smoking inside, so you may want to take that into consideration if you have to explain your stench to anyone.    

Club Accessibility (4.5/5) – Cheerleaders isn’t really within walking distance of most of the places that you’d want to be in Pittsburgh, but it’s not far from anything and is relatively close to the original Primanti Brothers location.  I recommend going there after the club though, because you probably won’t feel like having a girl grind on your lap for a while after pastrami, cole slaw and french-fry deliciousness.   

Overall – Cheerleaders is a nice club.  Not great, but nice.  Other than the bullshit pricing, they’re unspectacularly adequate across the board.  I probably prefer Blush overall, but if an upscale club with the most attractive dancers in the Burgh sounds like something that you’d be interested in, Cheerleaders is the place for you.

TOTAL SCORE = 52

1 comment:

  1. Had an amazing time ..seen a few girls being touched thought that was rather disgusting and my friends did too if u want keep it upscale keep the girls upscale and don't allow perversion and disrespect to ur employees ruins your reputation and makes your dancers look cheap

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