Filly Corral (Smithton, PA)

Quality of Dances (12.5/20) – These are some excellent nude lap dances.  You can't touch the crotch and I didn't get any signs that extras are available, at least during regular dances, but everyone provides a nice grind and most of the ladies encourage upper body 2-way contact.  Still, what they allow you to do isn't all that unusual.  It's what they're able to do that's really impressive.  Almost all of these ladies know how to work it with their knees, and I even witnessed one girl standing on the lap dance chair and working it with her foot.   That's not a move that I'd like to experience often, but a little variety is never a bad thing.  

Quality of Dancers (7/10) – These ladies redefine the strip-club-at-a-rest-stop scale.  When I first pulled up to this place, I was expecting a half dozen mid-forties enhanced bleached blond borderline lot lizards, but these ladies are genuinely hot.  During two visits, I saw one older dancer and one who could have stood to lose a few pounds, but the vast majority of the ladies in the place are all natural and would have been considered to be high quality even at a big city club.  As long as you're not expecting to see a bunch of 9s and 10s, you should be satisfied with these ladies.

Number of Dancers (7/10) – The Filly Corale is crawling with women.  There are always two ladies on stage at a time, the stage sets are usually just two songs long, and they don't repeat girls often.  Some of the girls hang out together near the stage, but there are always plenty of ladies on the floor and several working the crowd.

Variety/Diversity of Dancers (0.5/5) – You probably aren't expecting much diversity at a rest stop strip club in the middle of nowhere, and that's a good thing, because there's isn't much at this place. I've seen one black girl and one Asian in two visits, which means that about 95% of the ladies that I've seen have been white.

Attitude of Dancers (7.5/10) – Other than a few girls who don't work the crowd as much as I'd like, everyone here is really friendly.  Most of the ladies are actually good to talk to, and everyone that I've gotten dances from have plopped down on my lap to wait for a new song to start.  That should be standard in all clubs, but you have to request it at a lot of places.  I especially enjoyed the one girl who had a tattoo on her ass that read, "Your Name."  Now that's a girl with no plans of settling down anytime soon.  I also have to give some credit here to the club for promoting good interactions between customers and dancers.  Tips are appreciated for good lap dances, but the club has a sign up that tells you to talk to management if any of the ladies are pushy about it.

Value (7/10) – The nude stage action is very good, with a lot of ladies getting pretty graphic with lip spreading and some even allowing some tit grabbing at the rail.  The dances are a decent value at $20 each, and the $20 cover isn't even too bad since you get free beer.  Several of the Pennsylvania clubs that don't have liquor licenses give away beer, but it's been in tiny plastic cups everywhere else that I've been.  Here, you get cans of Bud Light.  I never thought that I'd be so excited about mediocre beer, but it's so delicious when it's (sortof) free.

Dance Setup (2/10) – The dance area is in a separate room from the main stage, but there's no privacy between the several customers who are usually getting a dance at the same time.  The half dozen chair in the room face each other and the room is way too bright, but at least you do get your own comfortable chair.

Club Setup (6/10) – The Filly Corral could pass for a dentist's office on the outside, but on the inside, it's pure strip club, and a pretty good one at that. There's a large, more or less rectangular bar that takes up half of the room, with a few restaurant style booths behind it and a nice but narrow two-pole main stage in front of it. There are also a few other chairs behind the main stage, two small overflow stages and a sectioned off floor level area called the "snake pit," but it seems like those are all rarely, if ever, used. Either way, I prefer to stay at the bar so that they can keep the "free" beers coming

Club Atmosphere (7.5/10) – You probably shouldn't bring your uptight business associates here (they might be freaked out by the "no spitting" sign, but I love the relaxed blue collar vibe. This is the type of place where everyone just assumes that you drive an 18-wheeler, and if you start to think that every night on the road would be as fun as a night at the Corral, you'll wish you did.

Club Accessibility (1/5) – The Filly Corral is right off of the PA turnpike and is right beside the Flying J travel plaza, so it's basically the best location ever for truck drivers. Sadly, for the rest of us, this club is in the fucking boonies.

Overall – The Filly Corral is, without a doubt, the best club that I've been to in Pennsylvania.  Just a really solid joint with hot, friendly girls, solid dances and no glaring weaknesses.  I don't know if I'd bother to drive 40 minutes each way to get here from Pittsburgh, but I'll definitely drive 20 minutes out of my way to hit it anytime that I'm traveling to Pittsburgh.

RAW SCORE = 58