Sunday, October 23, 2011

Spearmint Rhino (City of Industry, CA)

This club was personally recommended to me by the Strip Club Hound.  If you haven't checked out his site yet, make sure that you do, because it's a great read.  From the clubs that he's reviewed that I've been to, I can say he's dead on, but his inside perspective as a former club manager is the real reason to visit his site.

Quality of Dances (14/20) – Like at many of the City of Industry clubs, you will get excellent lap dances at the Spearmint Rhino.  Full two-way contact is encouraged, and if you’re shy about it, some of the ladies will move your hands to where they know you want them to be.  The grinding is decent, especially during the nude dances, but the ladies are very careful to keep a little bit of a tease going to try to sell the VIP dances.  Different girls have different limits back there, but your wallet is going to be the biggest limiting factor, because you shouldn’t have a had time finding a girl to give you a good time if you’re willing to give her a few hundred dollars.    

Quality of Dancers (8.5/10) – The girls at the Rhino are beautiful.  As with every Rhino that I’ve been to, there are more implants than I’d like to see, but with faces and bodies like these, I’ll happily overlook that. 

Number of Dancers (7.5/10) – You only get the full experience when they do the 2-4-1 parade since a lot of these ladies hang out in the dressing room except when their regulars stop by, but there are still plenty of ladies to keep all of the customers occupied. 

Variety of Dancers (3.5/5) – They’ve got white, Latina and Asian dancers and a wide range of ages, but you aren’t going to find many black or thicker dancers at this Spearmint Rhino.  Or any Spearmint Rhino, for that matter. 

Attitudes (6.5/10) – These ladies are hustlers, but it’s the good kind of hustling where they really seem genuine while pumping up your ego.  It was so impressive that I even decided to test them by talking about something that I knew they wouldn't be interested in just to see if they could keep up, and they did with flying colors.  If I didn't know any better, I'd have thought these ladies were genuinely interested in how many points Jarome Iginla is going to score for the Calgary Flames this year. Most if not all of the ego boosting is obviously bullshit, but that’s what customer service is all about, and the ladies know that it’s also the best way to empty your wallet.  What I really appreciate, though, it that the wallet emptying is done honorably, with very few girls asking for tips after dancers, just about everyone offering to get change for you if you overpay for dances, and one girl even suggesting that we wait for the 2-4-1 that she knew was coming even after I’d agreed to get a dance.  That should be a lesson for dancers everywhere – you might get the first hundred faster if you rip off a customer, but you’ll only get that 2nd, 3rd and 4th hundred if you make sure that he feels like his money is spent honestly. 

Value (2/10) – The $20 cover is rough, the sodas are a ridiculous $5 each, the waitresses are constantly trying to get you to buy drinks for dancers and the dances are overpriced at $20 for topless and $40 for nude since they’re only about two and a half minutes long.  If you want a VIP room, that’s 4 songs for $160 plus whatever you negotiate with the dancer, or you can pay something around $500 for some time in a private room.  The dance value is slightly increased if you wait for the frequent specials, but the two-for-ones definitely seemed to have shorter songs, and the dances during the “logo dances” couldn’t have been more than about a minute each.  The “logo dances” are supposed to be 4 dances and a t-shirt for $40, but I’m fairly certain that it didn’t last for more than 5 minutes, and who really wants a strip club t-shirt anyway?  I mean, if this guy who writes a strip club review blog and travels around the world to visit clubs would be too embarrassed to wear one, how shameless do you have to be to rock a Spearmint Rhino shirt in the real world? 

Club Setup (6/10) – The first thing that I noticed about the room was that the framed porn posters around the walls are much more graphic than I’m used to seeing in other Spearmint Rhinos, with some showing cocks and one even having cum dribbling down the girl’s face.  Despite that, this is a fairly classy club overall with a fireplace off to the side and a nice, medium sized stage in the center of the room.  Even though I’ve only seen one girl dancing at a time, they have two poles and a little leather ottoman up there for the girl to work with.  I usually like to see a larger bar than they have here and I’m not a fan of the way that the chairs are lined up in rows to face the stage as if you were at a play, but I guess there’s no reason to have the place set up for hanging out since it’s an alcohol-free club.  They know that you’re there to see women, so the whole setup is designed around that.  Unfortunately, the stage is so dark that you might not even be sure what you’re looking at half the time. 

Dance Setup (3/10) – The topless dance areas are little alcoves off of the back of the main area of the club.  There’s no privacy within them, but people in the other room can’t see you, and, since there are a few of those dance areas, you’ll usually be the only one in there unless they’re running a dance special.   The nude dance area is a little more private, but you’re going to want to go to the VIP area if you’ve got the cash for it, since they have nice couches back there and curtains that prevent anyone from seeing what you’re up to.  

Atmosphere (3.5/10) – There are a lot of states that have the topless-with-alcohol or nude-but-no-alcohol rules for strip clubs, but everywhere else that I’ve been, the better clubs chose the topless option.  I don’t know what it is about California that changes the equation, but out here, most of the good clubs are nude but don't serve alchohol.  Thankfully, the atmosphere is more similar to Little Darlings in Las Vegas than to the depressing juice bars that I’ve been to in New England, but I still feel like I’m missing half the experience if I’m not sipping a beer or my signature cocktail (as named by the bartendress at the Free Spirit Cafe, a “Peter Tips” is a redbull with a double shot of whiskey – try it, it’s delicious) while ogling titties.  The bar across the parking lot is at least some consolation, but since you can’t bring your drinks into the club, it’s still less than ideal.   

Lack of booze aside, this place is a little too loud so it can be tough to talk to the girls and it’s a little bit stuffy, but the crowd is decent and you should feel perfectly comfortable spending an hour or two here. 

Location (3/5) – The City of Industry isn’t particularly close to anything and there aren’t many hotels in the area, but since you’ll be stone cold sober, it’s not a big deal if you have to drive for a half hour to get home, and these clubs are worth the drive.  If it were just the Spearmint Rhino, it might be a tougher decision, but with Synn right down the street and the best Déjà Vu I’ve ever been to just a few minutes away, it’s not bad to make an evening of hitting these clubs.   

Overall – The City of Industry Spearmint Rhino is an excellent club regardless of your budget, but it can be amazing if you’re looking for the VIP experience and have the cash to make it happen.  That’s a little too rich for me, at least on a regular basis, but I’ll definitely be stopping by any time that I’m in the area.  Even if it is only as a warmup to/backup plan for the City of Industry Déjà Vu, which I like even more. 

RAW SCORE = 57.5


  1. Free Spirit Cafe? Peter must be a Rockville Ram.

  2. Thanks for sharing this post. I really appreciate it. Keep it coming!