Quality of Dances (7/20) – There's huge variation from girl to girl, with some girls giving what amounts to little more than an airdance and other girls giving a really solid grind. Of course, the usual skin color correlation is in full effect. There are exceptions, but generally, the quality increases as the skin gets darker right up until the Brazilian bronze, then slightly tapers off after that. Like the Gold Club in Hartford, they've got some strange rules in this place, with dancers having to keep their feet on floor at all times. Also, they say that you can't touch the dancers, but hands on the legs seems to be fine.
Quality of Dancers (7/10) – I haven't seen any real models here, but almost all the ladies are decent and most are well above average.
Number of Dancers (7/10) – There are usually about a half dozen girls dancing in the afternoon, and many more than that later in the evening. By the night, it's crawling with women, but no matter when you visit, it shouldn't take you long at all to get the attention of an attractive lady or two.
Variety/Diversity of Dancers (3/5) – They've got a decent mix of white and Latina dancers a with a few black ones mixed in. In my somewhat limited experience at the Gold Club, there seems to be more Latinas during the day shift, which is why you're much more likely to find me here in the afternoon. There's some variation of body types with a few thicker black girls, but most of the ladies seem to be in pretty good shape.
Attitude of Dancers (5/10) – The bartendresses are really friendly and the dancers aren't bad to talk to, but more than one has asked me to prepay for a dance and that's brutal. Do they really think that people are going to get a dance and then walk off without paying? If so, they either have some really shady customers or give some really unsatisfying dances.
Value (3.5/10) – Beers are usually $4.75 but they have $3 specials and it's BYOB next door at the nude club (After Dark) after midnight. Dances aren't as good of a deal, however, at $25 each. My first few visits were during the day shift when there was no cover, then the bartender gave me a bunch of free admission passes, so I'm not sure how much the cover would usually be. It's $10 at their Hartford location, so I'm assuming that it's comparable to that here as well.
Dance Setup (3.5/10) – They give lap dances on individual bench style seats that look comfortable at first but really aren't. There's a small divider between the benches, but people who are across from you can still watch you if they want.
Club Setup (5/10) – The mouth shaped urinals are somewhat unique, but the rest of the club is fairly mediocre. The whole place is very dark and has a warehouse feel, but the lap dance area is strangely brighter than everywhere else. There are a bunch of 2 person tables scattered around the club, two small stages, a pool table in the back and a very large nice bar. It looks like a dump from the outside and isn't all that well thought out but it's actually kind of classy despite the warehouse look.
Club Atmosphere (5.5/10) – The crowd is decent, but the 2-person tables and all the wide open space prevent it from being great for large or even medium sized groups. It seems to be a popular bachelor party destination on Saturday nights, so that may not be a great time to go if you're hoping to get lots of attention from the girls.
Club Accessibility (2/5) – The Gold Club isn't hard to get to from I-95, but you'll be driving to get there and to get home. Luckily, there's more than enough parking and there're some spots along the side so that everyone driving by won't see your car. There is, however, no discreet way to walk in the entrance in the front of the club.
Overall – The Gold Club Groton is a decent club. It's nothing that I'd go out of my way for, but it's a much better option than the Gold Club's Hartford location or Rose's Cantina down the street. If you've got time though, you'd be much better off driving the hour to Providence to have a really good time.
TOTAL SCORE = 48.5
Showing posts with label Gold Club. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Gold Club. Show all posts
Sunday, January 23, 2011
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Gold Club After Dark (Hartford, CT)
Note: This is the nude, alcohol-free side of the Gold Club in Hartford. It is alternately referred to as the Gold Club Connection and the Gold Club After Dark.
Quality of Dances (8/20) – These dances are slightly better than at the topless club next door, primarily because there is no strange pedestal that the dancers are required to keep one foot on. There is one-way contact from the dancers, but touching of the dancers seems to be frowned upon. You might be able to get away with a little bit with some dancers, but that seems to be the exception rather than the rule. The grind action is alright, but nothing special. One dancer who works in both the topless and nude clubs did offer takeout, but she was really struggling to make any money because she was not the least bit attractive. I don't get the feeling that many, if any, of the attractive dancers offer their services outside the club.
Quality of Dancers (4.5/10) – Most of the girls were in the 6-7.5 range, but a few dancers who have no business being in this line of work bring down the score. A few of the dancers from the topless club don't work on the nude side, but for the most part, the girls walk back and forth between the clubs.
Number of Dancers (3.5/10) – They send a few girls over to the nude club when there are customers, but there aren't nearly as many over here as there are in the topless club. They seem to keep it stocked enough to keep the customer-to-dancer ratio decent, but there aren't usually many women to choose from.
Variety/Diversity of Dancers (3.5/5) – I've seen plenty of black, Latina, and white girls here, including at least one very friendly eastern European. There may be a slighly smaller percentage of white women in the nude club than in the topless club, though that could have just been the case on the few nights that I've been there.
Attitude of Dancers (1.5/10) – These girls seem to be clingy and pushy, which is a terrible combination. The day shift girls at the topless club aren't nearly as bad, but since the nude club is only open at night, they miss out on that slight boost in the rating.
Value (0/10) – I seriously considered giving them the first ever negative score for value. A $10 cover isn't great, but the real killer is $35 for the dances. I've had girls offer me a handjob in other clubs for that, and here you can't even touch the girl. That's just brutal.
Dance Setup (2/10) – The dances are given in a narrow raised area at the back of the club. There aren’t booths, but at least it isn't a bench either. The chairs are fairly comfortable, but for $35, the dances should be given on a Craftmatic Adjustable Bed in a room with a locking door.
Club Setup (5/10) – The stage is about average and there are plenty of small tables throughout the room. I'd like to see some comfortable chairs and bigger tables, but I was pleased that the club was sufficiently dark.
Club Atmosphere (1/10) – As with all nude clubs in Connecticut, there's no alcohol here. The crowd seemed harmless, but an alcohol-free strip club is never going to score well on atmosphere.
Club Accessibility (3.5/5) – The club is in an industrial area in northern Hartford, but it isn’t too far from downtown and is right off of I-91.
Overall - This club is open after everything else in the area closes, but unless you're desperate to see some bush at 3am, there's no reason to come here. The topless Gold Club next door isn't good, but it's at least better than this.
RAW SCORE = 32.5
Quality of Dances (8/20) – These dances are slightly better than at the topless club next door, primarily because there is no strange pedestal that the dancers are required to keep one foot on. There is one-way contact from the dancers, but touching of the dancers seems to be frowned upon. You might be able to get away with a little bit with some dancers, but that seems to be the exception rather than the rule. The grind action is alright, but nothing special. One dancer who works in both the topless and nude clubs did offer takeout, but she was really struggling to make any money because she was not the least bit attractive. I don't get the feeling that many, if any, of the attractive dancers offer their services outside the club.
Quality of Dancers (4.5/10) – Most of the girls were in the 6-7.5 range, but a few dancers who have no business being in this line of work bring down the score. A few of the dancers from the topless club don't work on the nude side, but for the most part, the girls walk back and forth between the clubs.
Number of Dancers (3.5/10) – They send a few girls over to the nude club when there are customers, but there aren't nearly as many over here as there are in the topless club. They seem to keep it stocked enough to keep the customer-to-dancer ratio decent, but there aren't usually many women to choose from.
Variety/Diversity of Dancers (3.5/5) – I've seen plenty of black, Latina, and white girls here, including at least one very friendly eastern European. There may be a slighly smaller percentage of white women in the nude club than in the topless club, though that could have just been the case on the few nights that I've been there.
Attitude of Dancers (1.5/10) – These girls seem to be clingy and pushy, which is a terrible combination. The day shift girls at the topless club aren't nearly as bad, but since the nude club is only open at night, they miss out on that slight boost in the rating.
Value (0/10) – I seriously considered giving them the first ever negative score for value. A $10 cover isn't great, but the real killer is $35 for the dances. I've had girls offer me a handjob in other clubs for that, and here you can't even touch the girl. That's just brutal.
Dance Setup (2/10) – The dances are given in a narrow raised area at the back of the club. There aren’t booths, but at least it isn't a bench either. The chairs are fairly comfortable, but for $35, the dances should be given on a Craftmatic Adjustable Bed in a room with a locking door.
Club Setup (5/10) – The stage is about average and there are plenty of small tables throughout the room. I'd like to see some comfortable chairs and bigger tables, but I was pleased that the club was sufficiently dark.
Club Atmosphere (1/10) – As with all nude clubs in Connecticut, there's no alcohol here. The crowd seemed harmless, but an alcohol-free strip club is never going to score well on atmosphere.
Club Accessibility (3.5/5) – The club is in an industrial area in northern Hartford, but it isn’t too far from downtown and is right off of I-91.
Overall - This club is open after everything else in the area closes, but unless you're desperate to see some bush at 3am, there's no reason to come here. The topless Gold Club next door isn't good, but it's at least better than this.
RAW SCORE = 32.5
Saturday, March 13, 2010
Gold Club (Hartford, CT)
Note: This is the topless side of the Gold Club in Hartford. For the nude side, see the Gold Club Connection review.
Quality of Dances (7/20) – As with most clubs in Connecticut, only one-way contact is allowed. There’s no bouncer closely watching the action, but the rules still seem to be enforced for the most part. Also, the girls are required to keep one foot on a small pedestal during the dances, so they can't get too comfortable with the customers. The girls are about as aggressive as they can be given the constraints, but the results are still mediocre. One dancer did offer takeout, but she was really struggling to make any money because she was not the least bit attractive. I don't get the feeling that many, if any, of the attractive dancers offer their services outside the club.
Quality of Dancers (4.5/10) – Most of the girls were in the 6-7.5 range, but a few dancers who have no business being in this line of work bring the score down. One of the dancers looked suspiciously like a tranny, but I had no interest in confirming her status.
Number of Dancers (4.5/10) – There were about a half dozen girls working in the mid-afternoon, but there was only one on stage at a time and a few didn’t come out of the dressing room when they weren't on stage. It wasn’t crowded though, so it was relatively easy to get a girl for a dance. They have many more dancers working the night shift, but the number of customers obviously is higher then as well.
Variety/Diversity of Dancers (3.5/5) – I've seen plenty of black, Latina, and white girls here, including at least one very friendly eastern European.
Attitude of Dancers (2/10) – The day shift girls are friendly, but they're often a little too interested in telling their life stories. Hearing about your alcoholic ex and your 2 kids doesn’t really get me in the mood for a dance. The night shift girls seem to be clingy and pushy, which is a terrible combination. It's bad enough when a girl tries to talk you into a dance when you clearly aren't interested, but being called cheap because you don't want to spend $300 for a half hour in the VIP room with a dancer that you wouldn't even bother to tip at the stage is ridiculous.
Value (1.5/10) – The cover and drinks aren’t too bad, but $25 is too much for any dance, let alone for limited contact dances. Also, the bouncers expect tips but don't actually provide any service. The cover from the nude club is supposed to be good here, but the woman at the register questioned whether the smiley face stamp on my hand was really from that night until I gave her a tip.
Dance Setup (3.5/10) – The dances are given in a small section of the club along the one wall. There aren’t booths, but the chairs have large sides on them kind of like sleighs, so there’s still some privacy as long as people aren’t walking by.
Club Setup (5.5/10) – The club is fairly nice inside, but there needs to be more seats for people who don’t want to sit at the stage. Most of the people seem to just stay at the bar, where there's a decent view of the stage from the one side.
Club Atmosphere (5.5/10) – I wouldn’t hang out here for too long, but the atmosphere was reasonably relaxed and people seemed to be enjoying the food. The club next door is fully nude, but thankfully this place is just topless, so they’re still allowed to serve alcohol.
Club Accessibility (3.5/5) – The club is in an industrial area in northern Hartford, but it isn’t too far from downtown and is right off of I-91.
Overall - The Gold Club has potential if the ownership ever changes, but having shake down artists for bouncers and seriously overpriced dances is not a recipe for securing repeat visitors. With Electric Blue only 20 minutes away, I have no idea why anyone would come here.
RAW SCORE = 41
Quality of Dances (7/20) – As with most clubs in Connecticut, only one-way contact is allowed. There’s no bouncer closely watching the action, but the rules still seem to be enforced for the most part. Also, the girls are required to keep one foot on a small pedestal during the dances, so they can't get too comfortable with the customers. The girls are about as aggressive as they can be given the constraints, but the results are still mediocre. One dancer did offer takeout, but she was really struggling to make any money because she was not the least bit attractive. I don't get the feeling that many, if any, of the attractive dancers offer their services outside the club.
Quality of Dancers (4.5/10) – Most of the girls were in the 6-7.5 range, but a few dancers who have no business being in this line of work bring the score down. One of the dancers looked suspiciously like a tranny, but I had no interest in confirming her status.
Number of Dancers (4.5/10) – There were about a half dozen girls working in the mid-afternoon, but there was only one on stage at a time and a few didn’t come out of the dressing room when they weren't on stage. It wasn’t crowded though, so it was relatively easy to get a girl for a dance. They have many more dancers working the night shift, but the number of customers obviously is higher then as well.
Variety/Diversity of Dancers (3.5/5) – I've seen plenty of black, Latina, and white girls here, including at least one very friendly eastern European.
Attitude of Dancers (2/10) – The day shift girls are friendly, but they're often a little too interested in telling their life stories. Hearing about your alcoholic ex and your 2 kids doesn’t really get me in the mood for a dance. The night shift girls seem to be clingy and pushy, which is a terrible combination. It's bad enough when a girl tries to talk you into a dance when you clearly aren't interested, but being called cheap because you don't want to spend $300 for a half hour in the VIP room with a dancer that you wouldn't even bother to tip at the stage is ridiculous.
Value (1.5/10) – The cover and drinks aren’t too bad, but $25 is too much for any dance, let alone for limited contact dances. Also, the bouncers expect tips but don't actually provide any service. The cover from the nude club is supposed to be good here, but the woman at the register questioned whether the smiley face stamp on my hand was really from that night until I gave her a tip.
Dance Setup (3.5/10) – The dances are given in a small section of the club along the one wall. There aren’t booths, but the chairs have large sides on them kind of like sleighs, so there’s still some privacy as long as people aren’t walking by.
Club Setup (5.5/10) – The club is fairly nice inside, but there needs to be more seats for people who don’t want to sit at the stage. Most of the people seem to just stay at the bar, where there's a decent view of the stage from the one side.
Club Atmosphere (5.5/10) – I wouldn’t hang out here for too long, but the atmosphere was reasonably relaxed and people seemed to be enjoying the food. The club next door is fully nude, but thankfully this place is just topless, so they’re still allowed to serve alcohol.
Club Accessibility (3.5/5) – The club is in an industrial area in northern Hartford, but it isn’t too far from downtown and is right off of I-91.
Overall - The Gold Club has potential if the ownership ever changes, but having shake down artists for bouncers and seriously overpriced dances is not a recipe for securing repeat visitors. With Electric Blue only 20 minutes away, I have no idea why anyone would come here.
RAW SCORE = 41
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Gold Club (Bedford, NH)
Note: This review was based on a visit that took place while this was still Mark's Showplace. Some things may have changed since then, but based on comments from my readers, the dances aren't much better than they've ever been.
Quality of dances (1/20) – This category needs a lengthy explanation, because the club is great but the dances are among the worst I've ever had. In New Hampshire apparently it's state law to wear lame ass pasties over nipples, and there is absolutely no contact. One of the girls I talked to rolled her eyes sarcastically when she told me that, and unfortunately I wasn't smart enough to get a dance from her. I fell in love with a gorgeous young blonde who I'm sure would give a great dance in another state, and she appeared to try to cheat the rule as much as possible, but that is completely irrelevant to me. The only good thing is that the dance area is walled off from the rest of the club for good privacy, but what does it matter that no one can see a girl dancing 3 feet away from you.
Quality of dancers (8/10) – Every single dancer there was at least a 6, and a few were in the 8-9 range. No fatties, grandmas, or fakes. They all had very sexy outfits on as well.
Number of Dancers (9/10) – On a Monday afternoon there were 6 dancers, all out and about. I was told that, on Tuesday nights when it's a $2 cover and $2 drinks, they get 30+ dancers. Clearly I'll have to revisit the club on a Tuesday for, ahem, fact checking.
Variety/Diversity of dancers (2.5/5) – Though mostly white girls, there were a variety of body types and styles, and no fake tits. One Latina helped a little, but only a little.
Attitude of dancers (5.5/10) – After two girls ignored me walking by several times, a seasoned veteran came to sit down and invited her friend to hang out. They told us a few lame jokes and laughed at my awesome joke, and never pressured us about getting a dance. They didn't even get terribly upset when I went to get a dance from the hot blonde calling my name.
Value (5.5/10) – The cover is always $5, except on Tuesday it's $2 with $2 drinks. Monday has $1 Miller High Lifes, and $1 wing plate with french fries. Not much could be a better deal. Dances, however, at $20 are about $17 more than they should be for what you get. Stage value is terrible as well because of the no contact rule, and if you go up empty handed, you get what you pay for. (note: according to some readers who have visited more recently than I have, most or all of these prices have gone up since the Gold Club took over)
Dance Setup (2/10) – There's a room in the back end of the club that is 3/4 walled off and very large which is nice, but then there are uncomfortable old benches all along the walls, so everyone is watching everyone else's dance. There are also no partitions anywhere so you better hope Larry Craig isn't sliding his foot over even a little bit.
Club Setup (9/10) – One main stage, and two smaller stages spread almost equidistant so that when it's very busy you never have to look far for someone up there. Chairs/tables are very comfortable and spaced apart so you never feel cramped. There are two dark corners to hide out if you so choose, three large screen TV's with ESPN on, and the bar is a good size and never cramps anyone sitting nearby.
Club Atmosphere (9/10) – The feel of this club is that of a slightly upscale restaurant while still pulling off the casual relaxing pub type atmosphere, with lots of titties roaming around. A very difficult task to accomplish, but they pull it off. Hopefully next time I go back I'll see the shower show that received rave reviews from another patron.
Club Accessibility (1.5/5) – Roughly 5 miles from route 93, It's still pretty far from any real civilization. What can ya do, it's New Hampsha. Still, there is a hotel less than a mile away, so bachelor party possibilities linger in my mind. If you are going to go out of your way to get here though, just make sure that they're open, because, as I found out the hard way, they've got some strange hours of operation.
Overall – If you're in the area, stopping by is a must. Unfortunately, unless you are a hippie or are on your way between Boston and Canada on business, you'll never be in the area. Thankfully this place is worth a visit on the right nights to rip it up hard and crash at a hotel nearby. Just don't get your hopes up for dances, and forget about extras, as the manager banned girls making out during the shower show because it was "too sexual."
TOTAL SCORE = 53
Quality of dances (1/20) – This category needs a lengthy explanation, because the club is great but the dances are among the worst I've ever had. In New Hampshire apparently it's state law to wear lame ass pasties over nipples, and there is absolutely no contact. One of the girls I talked to rolled her eyes sarcastically when she told me that, and unfortunately I wasn't smart enough to get a dance from her. I fell in love with a gorgeous young blonde who I'm sure would give a great dance in another state, and she appeared to try to cheat the rule as much as possible, but that is completely irrelevant to me. The only good thing is that the dance area is walled off from the rest of the club for good privacy, but what does it matter that no one can see a girl dancing 3 feet away from you.
Quality of dancers (8/10) – Every single dancer there was at least a 6, and a few were in the 8-9 range. No fatties, grandmas, or fakes. They all had very sexy outfits on as well.
Number of Dancers (9/10) – On a Monday afternoon there were 6 dancers, all out and about. I was told that, on Tuesday nights when it's a $2 cover and $2 drinks, they get 30+ dancers. Clearly I'll have to revisit the club on a Tuesday for, ahem, fact checking.
Variety/Diversity of dancers (2.5/5) – Though mostly white girls, there were a variety of body types and styles, and no fake tits. One Latina helped a little, but only a little.
Attitude of dancers (5.5/10) – After two girls ignored me walking by several times, a seasoned veteran came to sit down and invited her friend to hang out. They told us a few lame jokes and laughed at my awesome joke, and never pressured us about getting a dance. They didn't even get terribly upset when I went to get a dance from the hot blonde calling my name.
Value (5.5/10) – The cover is always $5, except on Tuesday it's $2 with $2 drinks. Monday has $1 Miller High Lifes, and $1 wing plate with french fries. Not much could be a better deal. Dances, however, at $20 are about $17 more than they should be for what you get. Stage value is terrible as well because of the no contact rule, and if you go up empty handed, you get what you pay for. (note: according to some readers who have visited more recently than I have, most or all of these prices have gone up since the Gold Club took over)
Dance Setup (2/10) – There's a room in the back end of the club that is 3/4 walled off and very large which is nice, but then there are uncomfortable old benches all along the walls, so everyone is watching everyone else's dance. There are also no partitions anywhere so you better hope Larry Craig isn't sliding his foot over even a little bit.
Club Setup (9/10) – One main stage, and two smaller stages spread almost equidistant so that when it's very busy you never have to look far for someone up there. Chairs/tables are very comfortable and spaced apart so you never feel cramped. There are two dark corners to hide out if you so choose, three large screen TV's with ESPN on, and the bar is a good size and never cramps anyone sitting nearby.
Club Atmosphere (9/10) – The feel of this club is that of a slightly upscale restaurant while still pulling off the casual relaxing pub type atmosphere, with lots of titties roaming around. A very difficult task to accomplish, but they pull it off. Hopefully next time I go back I'll see the shower show that received rave reviews from another patron.
Club Accessibility (1.5/5) – Roughly 5 miles from route 93, It's still pretty far from any real civilization. What can ya do, it's New Hampsha. Still, there is a hotel less than a mile away, so bachelor party possibilities linger in my mind. If you are going to go out of your way to get here though, just make sure that they're open, because, as I found out the hard way, they've got some strange hours of operation.
Overall – If you're in the area, stopping by is a must. Unfortunately, unless you are a hippie or are on your way between Boston and Canada on business, you'll never be in the area. Thankfully this place is worth a visit on the right nights to rip it up hard and crash at a hotel nearby. Just don't get your hopes up for dances, and forget about extras, as the manager banned girls making out during the shower show because it was "too sexual."
TOTAL SCORE = 53
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