Hurricane Betty's (Worcester, MA)

Quality of dances (8/20) – The dances are nude, and even though some of the girls allow 2-way contact, most do not. Also, the bouncer checks in during the dance to make sure that you aren't having any fun. Extras would not be possible here due to the set up, but one of the dancers hinted that she's available outside of the club. Another dancer called her a "dirty hoe," but I'll take a dirty hoe over a prude any day.

Quality of dancers (5/10) – I have not seen any total stunners, but a few come close and help the score.

Number of Dancers (7/10) – The rotation was pretty solid, but there was only 1 girl on stage and 1 or 2 girls circulating most of the time during my day shift visit. There were several more girls in the dressing room, but they only came out when they were on stage. On a few packed Thursday nights, however, there were at least 15-18 girls in this small but cozy club. Props to the owner for rounding up the women.

Variety/Diversity of dancers (3.5/5) – The variety of dancers is probably the best thing about this club. It was about an even split between white, black, and Latina dancers, and there was even one older Asian during the day shift. Since returning, I did not see any Asians, blacks, and only 1 Latina. The diversity among white girls (thick/thin/big tits/little tits/tan/blonde/brunette) is pretty amazing. The only thing missing was a fire bush.

Attitude of dancers (6/10) – Most of the dancers look happy to be there, but a few of the girls are almost too friendly. One dancer wouldn't get off my lap even though I wasn't buying her drinks or tipping her, to the point where I couldn't go to the stage or get dances from anyone else. She was giving me more action for free at the table than I got during the dances, although that still isn't saying much. The ratio of dancers who give the always dreaded, "hi, wanna dance? No? See ya.,", to the more talkative bunch hurts this score, but the proud few keep it from dipping too low.

Value (5/10) – The cover and drinks are both $5 if you are over 21 ($20 if under), but the dances are overpriced at $20 and the stage action is below average even though it's fully nude. Beers are $5.50, and the waitress is super hot (though not a day over 18). Before she was told otherwise, I convinced her to let me do a tequila body shot off of her gorgeous rack, complete with salt and lime on either side.

Dance Setup (1/10) – There's a row of chairs along the wall in the main room for the dances. Even though a curtain keeps people at the stage from seeing you, it doesn't stop the other girls who are giving dances from watching and it's low enough that the bouncer can look over the top. Everyone who walks in can take a peek as well. There is a "champagne" room, but even the girls tell you it's not worth your time. That's the only advertisement I needed to avoid it all together.

Club Setup (2/10) – There are a lot of tables and the stage is fairly large, but the club is tiny and can be cramped if it's even remotely busy. There are very few places to sit where the speakers aren't exploding your ear drums as well, so it's hard to navigate a comfortable place to sit.

Club Atmosphere (2/10) – This isn't exactly a shady club, but something just doesn't seem quite right about it. It's down the street from Platinum Premier, and probably gets most of it's business from the 18 year old college kids who need a lesson in strip club etiquette, pronto.

Club Accessibility (4/5) – Hurricane Betty's is near Holy Cross, not far at all from downtown Worcester. They have their own free parking lot, but I wasn't overly confident that my car would be alright while I was in the club. I didn't have any problems though.

Overall – This club, in my eyes, is Rachel Ray. Rachel Ray is an enigma. Is she hot? Is she fat? What size are her tits? I can never tell. The same can be said for Hurricane Betty's. If you find the right girls in the club, you'll have a great time. If not, it could be a disaster.

TOTAL SCORE = 43.5