Tuesday, May 19, 2009

The Men's Club (Raleigh, NC)

Quality of dances (15/20) – The girls are friendly – very friendly. Roughly 50% of them will offer extras and all are full contact. Most will try to keep you for another song, but the songs are all at least 3 minutes and very hard to turn down, though they are $30 each and not full nude.

Quality of dancers (7/10) – Though these weren't the finest women I've ever seen, they all dressed to impress with nicely flattering outfits.

Number of dancers (9/10) – Every hour on the hour, the DJ comes on and says, “heeeeeeeeere they come gentlemen!” On that cue, girls start walking from upstairs down a staircase onto the stage and then down to the floor. At first there were 5…then 10…20…30 girls came out. They all hold 8x5 plastic cards that are like the tickets you win at Chuck E. Cheese for prizes, except the prizes are X-rated. If you get a “two-for-one” dance, you get the card that is worth 2 points to be used at the X-rated shop. With 4 points I got a golf towel, cigar cutter and lighter (it's still unclear to me how any of those items are X-rated).

Variety/Diversity of dancers (2.5/5) – I think I got a dance from four different eastern European countries. That's plenty diverse for me, but the remaining founders are partial to a wider variety of racial backgrounds and body types, so the club falls a little short here.

Attitude of Dancers (6/10) – Everyone here is having themselves a blast. The downside is that not many girls will hang out unless you’ll give them a dance within 5 minutes.

Value (5/10) – $12 cover (odd), and beers are $6. Cigars start at $15 and are severely overpriced, even for a strip club. Dances are $30 unless you get the 2 for 1. However, everything is quality.

Dance Setup (7.5/10) – Getting to the private dance area feels like a 3 mile walk, but you get a comfy couch and great privacy when you eventually arrive.

Club Setup (2/10) – This place is huge, probably the biggest I’ve been to. As big as it is, somehow they manage to make you feel cramped no matter where you are, so the only dark corners would be in the VIP area.

Club Atmosphere (2/10) – Topless, smoking is permitted. Very loud and cramped when it’s busy and you feel like you’re at a huge bachelor party all the time (for some readers, this might be a good thing, so adjust upwards accordingly).

Club Accessibility (0/5) – Close to the highway, but not much else. It's about 45 minutes from anywhere.

Overall – Though it’s a drive from wherever you are, it’s definitely worth checking out at least once. The points store sells anything from iPods to a Mercedes (wow, that’s a lot of dances). If you’re in North Carolina for a golf vacation like I was, make the trip.


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