Planet Lockwood (Billings, MT)

Quality of dances (6/20) - There's decent one-way contact, but the rule against customers touching dancers is strictly enforced.

Quality of dancers (6/10) - Maybe my expectations were low, but I was pleasantly surprised. Finding several girls to look at was not a problem.

Number of dancers (5/10) - I've only been there once, but there was a reasonable number of dancers working the night that I stopped by. There were even more customers though, so the ratio still wasn't all that favorable.

Variety/Diversity of dancers (2/5) - Even though most of the girls here are white, there still seems to be more diversity than I expected for a club in Montana.

Attitude of Dancers (6/10) - The feature dancer was terrible, but everyone else was pretty friendly. I should note here that I harbor strong negative feelings towards feature dancers. They're usually just douche magnets who attract the worst possible crowd to a club: loud and obnoxious juiceheads. They often force a cover where one wouldn't otherwise exist, and for the most part, they aren't as attractive as half the dancers working there. Like Toby, they are the worst.

Value (3.5/10) - Dances are expensive, but drinks and cover were reasonable.

Dance Setup (5/10) - The dances are given in medium sized booths in a separate room from the main stage.

Club Setup (1/10) - The stage takes up most of the club, and there aren't enough tables around it, so you either have to share a table with strangers (yikes) or stay at the stage.

Club Atmosphere (3/10) - I rode there on a Suzuki sportbike, and it was a Harley crowd that didn't seem to take kindly to outsiders. The people who weren't angry bikers mostly seemed like d-bags. There were female audience members taking their tops off though, so I can't completely bash the atmosphere.

Club Accessibility (3.5/5) - You could probably walk to the club from downtown Billings, but it would take a while.

Overall - I can't really recommend a club that scores a 41, but there doesn't seem to be much else to do in Billings at night, so I can't recommend against going there either.

TOTAL SCORE = 41